These past four years have followed a trend. A trend of sadness and loss, and just when I think we deserve a break on the tragedy and drama front -another family member falls ill, or dies, or requires more thoughts and prayers than my weary spirit is sometimes capable of mustering.
But when I look at these past four years with the omission of these losses, a different trend emerges. One of growth, and success, and the achievement of goals -the surpassing of dreams. While it’s impossible to separate out the good from the bad, it’s been important for me to look upon the good as a source of strength. Eric and I have achieved more this year than we ever thought possible. 2015 was filled with commendations, pats on the back, acceptance into what was once a shadowed and unknowing world of music and art and creativity. The taste makers and the ones who guarded the gate finally decided they’d let us in. It came from hard work and sometimes painful perseverance, and the work continues -for as quickly as the gate opens, the gate closes.
Every year, for the past four years, I think to myself “next year couldn’t possibly be as bad as the last.” And then, somehow, it is still filled with loss, and pain, and suffering. It is only now that I’m beginning to understand that life is just this way. That all the 31 years previous I was lucky. 2016, no doubt, will be filled with additional losses, additional pain, additional grief. But at least, I hope, if we keep working, and keep ourselves honest, there will be more good to keep us strong.
Happy New Year.